Every time I kiss a girl, I have the issue of pre-ejaculatory fluid without getting an erection at all (completely flaccid). I only got an erection and pre-ejaculatory fluid when my penis touched her belly while we were both naked. I lost the erection while reaching for the condom and putting it on, and for some reason could not get it hard enough for sex again after this, even with her stimulating it. I was eventually able to climax from her masturbating me, but only got really hard when I climaxed. When I kiss a girl, why do I leak pre-ejaculatory fluid (cowper's fluid) but not get any erection? Why do I leak pre-ejaculatory fluid without obtaining an erection and why am I experiencing trouble getting and staying hard so that I can have sex?

This issue is ruining my self confidence and hinders me from pursuing a relationship with a girl as it is lowering my self esteem. I have been told that this issue will resolve itself if I get into a proper, intimate relationship with a girl and become comfortable, but I still am nervous about having this issue.

I used to (and still sometimes) masturbate excessively (3-5 times daily, sometimes more). Could the issue be related to this? I am confident that the problem is not a physical issue as I do wake up most mornings with morning erections.

This is a frustrating issue for me and I want to know what the best course of action is to resolve this issue so that I can feel better and more comfortable pursuing an intimate relationship with a woman in the future.