Resolved question:
My husband and I been together for 20 years. We have 3 kids.
I have been diagnose Bipolar Disorder since 2008 and I'm fully recover by taking my medication properly everyday. My psychiatrist told me that I'm almost 100% recover from the bipolar disorder.
My husband got depress since 2012 and he is back and forward to see so many psychiatrist.
First he didn't feel something wrong about himself but I can see something wrong about his depress that I can't help but worry about him. He is so easy to get angry just because a little mistake and the lack of sleep, work over time and etc.He tries to see doctors but the diagnose and medication always not suit him according to his feel. He said, it's make him feel week and more depress than before.
In that time, I still encourage him to see some other psychiatrist and I told him to never give up till he find the right medication for himself. I'm so glad he finally find the clue in the middle of 2013.
The psychiatric said he got OCPD. I think is the mild OCPD.
The doctor gave him valdoxan to take daily start from 25mg.
Now he took 12.5mg every night.
We talk about his OCPD and etc as we are very open about our sickness.
But I finally understand my questions mark about all his bad behavior back in those year.
Honestly I suffer a lot from his over protective behavior and the rules that he set for me.
He loves me, and I love him but recently he refuse to sleep in our room.
We still have sex together but he refuse to sleep with me at night.
He set his work room since 5 years ago but he never sleep separately with me but recently he sleep in his work room. He's been working overseas and we're rarely see each other in month.
I ask him why he doesn't want to sleep with me and he answer that I have been disturbing his sleep all the time by making noise in our room. He said he held back those year but now he doesn't want any fight between us. His words hurt me a lot but I try to be more understanding because maybe I hurt him a lot during my mania bipolar back in those year. I try to understand deeply but the sudden changes sometime make me feel sad and worthless as a wife.
I know I must to deal with OCPD husband as I read more about it but somehow I can get exhausted emotion by time goes by. Tired.
He refuse to stay with me for a long time as he said his work at the overseas need to be done.
He choose to work than to spend more time with his family. I don't angry or sad because of that, because I know he love to work, he find his happiness in his work.
I'm just shock about the separate room rule he begin now and I don't know what await for me in the future of our family.
Can you help me how to deal with my husband (Mild OCPD) in my condition?
I really need help and tips for dealing with him.
Thanks
Submitted:
4 Days
Category:
Psychiatrist
Hello,
Thanks for posting your query at DoctorSpring.com
I have gone through all the information that you have posted. I really appreciate your openness and acceptance towards psychiatric illnesses and finally that has helped you in coming over the bipolar disorder.
I totaly agree with you that unbearable noise is a very bizzare reason for not sleeping together. However now tha he is doing it there are two ways. In either ways a clear communication is a must be between you and your husband. You need to express that how decision to sleep separately is hurting you a lot and you wish to find a solution for it. Then I guess you can go ahead with an ENT consult for excess snoring. Many reasons for snoring are correctable. He may evaluate you for some reasons.
For the ocpd of your husband, medicines are unfortunately not a solution. He will require psychotherapies such as relaxation therapy, cognitive behavioural therapy, mindfullness , etc. All these therapies are under taken by a clinical psychologist. You should get hold of one get these therapies started. As they are not related to medicines I am sure your husband won't mind going ahead with them.
Kind regards.
If you have any additional queries do let me know.
Dr. Srikanth Reddy MD
What if I ignore my feeling about separate sleep and continue to watch how the things going on?
Will his OCPD going to be better or worst?
I don't know how to help him beside give him my full support.
I'm just stuck in his OCPD situation.
Hello
You may try giving it some time. There is no hurry to treat. Like other psychiatric illnesses, OCPD is a static diagnosis and its not going to get worse.
By best wishes for you.
Regards